How do I know if I'm lifting heavy enough, and when should I go heavier?
Here's the simple test: at the end of a set, could you have done two or three more good reps? If yes, go a little heavier next time. If your form falls apart, go lighter. Your reps may drop when the weight goes up, and that's fine. Write down what you lift, so next week you know what to beat.
Heavy enough is personal.
It's measured against you.
And it changes as you get stronger.
Why is it so hard to know if a weight is heavy enough?
Because nobody ever told you what heavy enough feels like.
I hear versions of this on coaching calls all the time:
- The "is this good?" lifter. You're holding a weight and you honestly don't know if it's too light, too heavy or just right.
- The careful one. You've always stayed light, just in case.
- The rep counter. By the last set you're working hard, so surely that's enough?
- The copycat. You pick up whatever I'm using in the video, because that seems like the safe answer.
Right?
All four are normal.
And all four get easier once you have a simple test.
What's the test for heavy enough?
Pay attention to the last few reps of your set.
- You could have done two or three more good reps. That weight is ready to go up. Next time, pick the heavier one.
- The last couple of reps were hard, and your form held. That's the sweet spot. Stay there and own it.
- Your form fell apart before the end. Too heavy for today. Go down a little and build back up.
Good reps are the key word.
A rep where your back arches, your knees cave or you swing the dumbbell up doesn't count toward the test. Form comes first, then weight.
When should I go heavier?
When the test says so.
Here's how that tends to play out in our workouts:
- Your reps will drop a little. When you go up in weight, you won't get as many reps as you did with the lighter one. That's expected. If you only get a few good reps with the heavier dumbbell, do the few.
- Legs usually move up first. Your legs are strong, and they tend to want more weight sooner than your shoulders and arms.
- Bands change things. When a move adds a fabric band, you may need a lighter dumbbell to keep your form clean.
- A new phase starts a little lighter. When a new program begins, start a bit under where you finished the last one. Then build.
And write it all down.
Chris explains it like this: week 1 sets the bar. Every week after, you look at what you did and beat it a little. On the strength days, he tells you inside the workout how to beat it, and the program builds toward a peak week.
That's how you stop guessing.
Your notebook tells you.
Not sure what weights to buy in the first place? Here's what equipment you actually need.
Should I use the same weights as Elle in the videos?
Please don't.
I'm on camera doing every workout so you can see what each move looks like. My dumbbells are picked for my body on that day.
Yours get picked by the test.
Some of you will lift heavier than me on certain moves. Some of you will start lighter. Both are exactly right.
Can we please stop pretending the tiny pink dumbbells you could lift all day are going to change anything, though? If a set feels easy from the first rep to the last, it's time to go up.
Does heavier always mean progress?
No. Heavier is one way to progress, and there are others.
In our workouts, progressive overload means doing a little more over time. That can look like:
- One more rep than last week, same weight.
- One more set of a move.
- A slower lowering, so the muscle works longer.
- A pause at the bottom or the top of the move.
- A heavier dumbbell, when the test says you're ready.
If there's a big jump between the pairs you own, you're not stuck. Your coach can show you how to keep progressing with what you've got.
New to all of this? Here's how progressive overload works for beginners.
What if going heavier hurts?
Working hard and hurting are two different things.
A hard set feels like effort in the muscles you're working. Sharp pain, pain in a joint, or pain that sticks around for days is a different story.
If something hurts, stop that move and tell your coach. If it doesn't settle, get it checked by your doctor or physio. Here's what normal soreness looks like, and when to get it checked.
Why does lifting heavier matter after 40?
Here's the thing.
Chris says it simply: "Muscle is metabolism."
Light weights you could lift all day don't give your body much reason to build or keep muscle. A weight that challenges you does. In our experience, that's what keeps your body composition changing.
Most women come to us wanting to lose weight. What they actually want to lose is fat.
Building strength, eating enough and recovering well is how we coach that. We've helped 1,000+ women lose 10 to 20 lbs of fat in 8 weeks.
And plenty of them started out asking the exact question at the top of this page.
Stuck on one move in particular? Here's what to do if you can't do a push-up yet.
Ready to stop guessing at the weights?
You don't need to lift what anyone else lifts.
You need a simple test, a notebook and a coach who looks at your numbers with you.
Start with the short video on our homepage at fortyfwd.com. It walks through why your body stopped responding after 40 and the method we use to change that.
If it sounds like you, apply for a call with Chris.
He reads every application himself. On the call, he'll ask what your training looks like now, weights and all, and tell you straight whether the program is the right fit. If it is, he walks you through the investment then, once you both know it's a fit.
Pick up the heavier pair.
Let's see what you've got.
Frequently asked questions
How do I know if my dumbbells are heavy enough?
At the end of a set, ask whether you could have done two or three more good reps. If yes, go a little heavier next time; if your form fell apart, go lighter.
Do I need to lift heavy weights to lose weight after 40?
You need weights that challenge you, which looks different for every woman. In our experience, strength training that builds week to week, with enough food and recovery, is what changes your body composition.
Is it normal to do fewer reps when I go heavier?
Yes. Your reps tend to drop when the weight goes up, and a few good reps with the heavier dumbbell still count.
Should I lift the same weights as the woman in the workout video?
No. Pick your weights with the reps-left test and write them down, so you're working from your own numbers.
What if lifting heavier hurts?
Effort in the working muscles is normal, but sharp pain or joint pain isn't. Stop that move, tell your coach and get it checked by your doctor or physio if it doesn't settle.